With apologies to John Lennon Imagine there’re no qualia It’s easy if you try No feel or what-its-likeness Just plain old cog sci Imagine all the zombies Being just like us Imagine there’re no inverts It isn’t hard to do Nothing for Mary to learn And no hard problem, too Imagine all the people Being illusionist You may say I’m a quiner But there’s nothing wrong with that I hope someday you’ll join us And learn what it’s like to be a bat.

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